Start by staying calm and opening a gentle, unhurried conversation — your steadiness is what makes it safe for your child to talk. Listen fully, reassure them it is not their fault, and let them know you are glad they told you. Resist the urge to leap into action driven by anger or panic. Once your child feels heard and believed, you can calmly gather the facts and plan the next steps together.

Generally, no. Confronting the other child or their parents yourself tends to escalate things, can put your child in a worse position, and rarely resolves it. The more effective route is to document what is happening and work through the school, which is expected to act and can respond in ways parents cannot. Channel the protective instinct into a calm, coordinated response rather than a direct confrontation.

Calmly and as a partner. Note what happened — when, where, and who was involved — then ask to see the school's anti-bullying policy and agree a plan together. Most schools have a policy or committee and a duty to act. Keep a record of your conversations and follow up. A collaborative, documented approach usually achieves far more than an angry one, and gives your child a consistent, supportive response in both places.

Avoid reacting with anger or panic, dismissing or minimising it, or telling your child to "toughen up" — these leave them feeling more alone. Don't charge off to confront the bully or their parents, or let guilt and fear drive impulsive action. And don't leave your child to solve it by themselves. Bullying involves a power imbalance a child often cannot fix alone; your calm, active support is exactly what helps.

Practise calm, assertive responses together — role-play saying "stop" firmly and walking away, which is assertive rather than aggressive. Encourage them to stay near friends and trusted classmates, since bullying happens less when a child is not alone, and make clear that telling an adult is brave and sensible, not "tattling." Building their confidence through activities where they feel strong helps too. These skills matter because you cannot be present for every moment.

Yes — there is good evidence behind it. Bullies tend to target children who are alone, and having friends or trusted classmates nearby is a genuine deterrent. Research also shows that when a peer steps in, bullying often stops within seconds. Helping your child stay connected to supportive peers, and encouraging a culture where children look out for one another, is a simple but powerful protection.

Usually not. Retaliating — physically or verbally — tends to escalate the situation, can get your child hurt or in trouble, and rarely stops the bullying. The more effective approach is assertive, not aggressive: a firm "stop," walking away, staying near others, and telling an adult. Teaching your child to respond with calm confidence, and ensuring the adults around them act, protects them far better than fighting back.

Gently and steadily. Encourage activities and friendships where your child feels capable and valued, especially away from where the bullying happens, and notice and affirm their strengths. Keep their wider life full so bullying does not define them, and keep offering warmth and reassurance at home. Confidence knocked down by bullying can be rebuilt over time, and a secure, loving base with you is the foundation for it.

Stay calm but persistent. Put your concerns in writing, refer to the school's own anti-bullying policy, and escalate to a senior leader or the relevant governing body if needed, keeping a record throughout. Meanwhile, continue supporting your child at home and protecting their wider world. If your child's wellbeing is suffering and the situation is not improving, involving a psychologist can help them cope while you keep pressing for the response they deserve.

Consider it if your child's confidence, mood, sleep, or functioning has taken a real knock, if the bullying is severe or ongoing, or if they are struggling to recover. Seek help promptly — without delay — if your child seems hopeless, alarmingly withdrawn, or you are ever worried about their safety. A psychologist can help your child process the experience so it leaves no lasting scars, and support you in helping them feel strong again.

Yes — and it helps to actively reframe it for them. Reporting bullying is sensible and brave, not tattling; the distinction is that telling is about keeping someone safe, not getting someone in trouble for its own sake. Children often stay silent out of shame or fear, so making it normal and safe to tell a trusted adult — and being someone who responds calmly when they do — is one of the most protective things you can offer.